"The central dilemma of the non borderline presents you with a quandary that in and through its predicament reveals a puzzle that you then feel compelled to solve. The what-to-do conundrum is unearthed. Your pain, the pain of loving someone with BPD compels you to want to help and to want to fix the problem to restore a sense of connectedness that continues to be puzzling, painful, and illusive. Where is love in all of this?"

-- A.J. Mahari in her Ebook, "The Dilemma on the Other Side of BPD" - Borderline Love?

"Hope for change and recovery in a loved one with BPD often causes non borderlines to compulsively focus on the borderline and try to fix him or her in ways that only increase the pain, suffering, and confusion for the non borderline. When is hope really hope? When is hope false hope? I talk about the different faces and consequences of hope. Hope is often one of the biggest hooks and traps for the non borderline and I explain why."

-- A.J. Mahari in her Audio Program, "The Puzzle and Mystery of Hope on the Other Side of BPD"

"Each one of us is born alone. Born to be the very unique human being that he/she is. Each one of us will die alone. In between, in the natural order of life, there are times when we must be alone due to circumstance or times when we may need to be alone to take care of ourselves and find our own way through troubled and painful seasons. Being alone is not necessarily the reason for feeling the pain of loneliness."

-- A.J. Mahari in her Ebook, "Loneliness - Its Promise of Transformation"